Again weird

Someone said this or I am telling . . .

For every plan there already exist a master plan .

for some sort of reasons I want to believe this and planing to believe this. In fact I have started to believe this.
I want to believe that not only me but some one else is very interested in my life as I am( I mean 'God') who even have superior strength to change it totally.


Yesterday My thoughts where high - was thinking about suicides- and I conclude if I be doing I will be cutting my veins ( left and right ) both hand veins. Just because after a lot of thinking I felt it is really cool stuff. You can cut it, after a while you feel not to suicide. you still can call the doctor or ambulance.. its a slow death.. unlike other easy suicide methods it can give you all the sweetness of pain you want to have the last minute. slow one in which you may really look forward to death. you may even stop suicide_ing just of the fact that you don't know the world you may enter after your death also have all sort of issues you had in this world. you dont know what will come for you there. Again I think people who suicide doesn't do it for them self. but for others to suffer for a lifetime thinking of them. (sadist people (Not all of them , I agree)).
I don't plan any suicide method for ME. Nor will I do ( I am making My self sure about it :P ) Yes! in need have problems life.. But nothing worth of a suicide.

If you ask me about my problems - It may end up you hearing - my pencil broke every day- my notepad doesn't last more than a week- my mom calls me chitra not sweet heart . Well !!! so never bother even to ask about my list of problems.

It is true that " You are wise if you think a lot of stupid , blunder stuff and then not say it. But I always say it " .(I don't really remember the line)
Still I manage to say my thought :D .


Mood : Depressed :(